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Hello,
We had an interesting question posed at last night’s on-line AA meeting. I wanted to throw it out to others to get your responses. The question was along the lines of, “How did you come to determine that you needed help in stopping your drinking (or drugging)?”.
For me, I didn’t make the choice. It was made for me by my family. Prior to going into treatment, I didn’t think I needed help. I didn’t realize that not only did I have a problem, I was the problem! I would put the blame for my problems on other people’s shoulders. As long as I saw my problems as other people’s fault, I didn’t need to go to treatment for that. After all, how could “I” going to treatment help the other people’s faults???
It was only once I was in the treatment center that I looked around and saw a large group of people that were just like me. They had the same stories and experiences. The only difference was they admitted they were alcoholics and addicts; I didn’t. After about 3-4 days in the treatment center, I fully embraced Step 1 of Alcoholic’s Anonymous. Once I admitted I was powerless over alcohol and my life had become unmanageable, I could see that I couldn’t ‘cure’ my drinking on my own. I needed help. Help that was available in that treatment center.
That’s when I determined that I needed a treatment center to deal with my drinking. Kind of an after-the-fact realization.
How about others? What were your experiences like? How did you make that determination that you needed help?
Thank you in advance for sharing. I learn so much from others, whether in a treatment center, in daily life or on a website, such as this. Tom G.
I decided I needed help “this”time!! And I say this time, because I have quit before butbit was for other reasons, other people! So THIS time it was MY determination thatbi needed and wanted the help. And it was just that I did something, a drug I never thought I would do! And I did! For me that was it…that was what made me realize I could not do this anymore!! I got scared of where my life could be. I was so very fortunate I was able to not get ” hooked” on the first try! As I have heard it has and can happen. I mean I wasn’t afraid to try it but something, a blessing, my higher power working whom I did not know just yet, working. But yes something inside told me you better stop now or the next one might just be it! So, that was it! No More and I decided then I was done!! I got clean on 12/15/2014 and have been clean since!
My story falls along the same line as yours Tom. There was a point and time where I did not believe that I had a problem. It was everyone else that had a problem and they needed to do something about it. Then as I began to become more aware to the fact that I was a slave to the cycle, I entered the stage where I was realizing that I had a problem, but there was a sick comfort in my actions and I did not want help. Not long before I was sent to the recovery center, which I now am a staff member at, I woke up one morning (in jail) and could not take it any more. I never wanted to feel that way again. That alone was not enough to get me to stop using. No matter where I went I would find ways and means to get that next fix, no matter what. It wasn’t until June 1, 2015 when I was sent to treatment that I had my first full 24 hours free of any mind and mood altering substances. Today, there is no more excuses. I never have to feel the way that I felt for so many years unless I choose to.
One more post: I understand your statement about it being everyone else’s fault. I blamed my husband many times. I always told him he blew things out of proportion and that if he wouldn’t be so negative and against drinking it wouldn’t be a big deal. And that it wasn’t bad to just have a drink every now and then. However my one drink most times turned into many and a drunk state. And sometimes extremely drunk state. Now he is not here to blame anymore and I wish I had conquered this before he passed. Now I see though that it wasn’t fault. It was me.
