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[izytet]

hi my name is jessica, I have been sober from heroin, pills, alcohol and all since Nov. 26,2012. I was living down in Austin since my sober date and am now back in my hometown and having a hard time with this small town, meeting people and trauma of my past not to mention I used to use with my family and am now back since july 2015. its been hard here and I just need some direction and suggestion soo I came on here as well as a call for help.

[Heidi Quist]

Hey Jessica –
Have you been to any meetings in your small town? Is going to another town for meetings an option? Do you have a good sponsor to call when you are not feeling the best? You’ve been in recovery for a good chunk of time, that’s awesome! Are you looking for any specific advice? Whenever I’m feeling down and out I meet someone for coffee, make a meeting, try some fellowship, try to be of service somewhere to get out of my own head…does any of this sound like it would be something that would help? – Heidi

[Tom G]

Jessica, I’m glad you are reaching out for help. It shows you want to win at this sobriety thing; not just give up and go away.
I would totally agree with Heidi, getting to a meeting or, at least being able to talk to someone who understands what you’re going through can only help.
I will only speak from my own experience (I’m not an addict, I’m an alcoholic): I can’t be around people who would do anything, whether intentionally or not, to undermine my sobriety. There are people who would ‘sabbatoge’ my sobriety in order to feel better about themselves. They may be alcoholics who haven’t admitted they were powerless over alcohol and wish to see others lives as unmanageable, to justify their continued use. Like the person who builds themselves up by tearing others down.
Also, there may be people like my mom. A person that knows I’m an alcoholic, but still offers me drinks, just to be polite. She isn’t intentionally trying to end my sobriety, she doesn’t understand the disease.
In either case, others could dangle the carrot in front of my nose and lead me to taking that first drink.
If I were in your situation, I’d avoid, at all costs, the people that could undermine your sobriety (and being clean from drugs). Even if they are family members!
Like Heidi said, be around other people who have your sobriety at the forefront. If your town doesn’t have an AA or NA meeting, call your AA area office and ask for contacts in your area of people with whom you can meet or speak to on the phone. If you can’t get that connection made, let me or Heidi know and we can work out a confidential way to get you in contact with the people who will help you.
Your sobriety is keeping you sane and alive! It may be uncomfortable to distance yourself from family members or friends, but your sobriety must come first.
I’m pulling for you to continue to be happy and healthy. I get that you want that too. That’s why you reached out. Keep coming back! Tom G.

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