It’s that time of year again where our kids go back to school and as parents we breathe a sigh of relief.  As a stay at home mom there is something so amazing about kids going back to school!! I kept my children fed, took them places, saw fun things, played 5 million board games and tried my best to keep them away from the “crack cocaine” A.K.A. electronic devices.  I get so excited for my kids to go back to school because I’m pretty much toast by September when it comes to being the entertainer and the one man show.

This year after dropping my kiddos off to school I got home poured my cup of coffee and sat in my living room. I took a deep breath and thought phew…got through this summer now I get to take some time for myself.  Although I felt odd and could not pin point what the heck was the ache in my heart/soul.  Was it change…was it empty home…was it too quiet…was it the tedium of life?? Or…was it I had not done self-care all summer and now I was finally feeling its heavy weight on my soul.

I am often wrapped up in what my kids are doing from day to day that I can’t even sit and think about myself or what I may need.  I had one amazing long cry all morning with my pot of coffee.  As a parent I realize when I took the plunge of having kids I knew I was going to be putting them first, I knew that I was going to have to learn to be selfless but in the mix I think I forgot that without taking care of myself I can’t take care of others.   Somehow I managed to float through this summer without any focus on what my soul may have needed but the first day I felt all that emotion and daily work on self that I had missed.

After a good couple hours of crying and trying to figure out why I was so emotionally drained I called my sponsor and a good friend I have in recovery.  We talked about self-care and the importance of taking care of “you”. As a mom I instinctively want to always being doing things for my children but I forgot balance.

As a second week starts of school I look ahead to balance for me and my children…balance for my soul and my schedule to make sure I am getting my needs met so I can be a better mother.  I hope all the parents out there are having a great start to this new school year…remember balance and take care of yourself so you can be available to your children physically and emotionally!

 

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