Re: Frustrated

Tom G

Jodi, I totally feel and understand your frustration. I, too, get frustrated when I take on a commitment and am way more committed to the task being done well than others are. I can take it personally when the group doesn’t follow through on their commitments.
That’s when I step back and remember the meaning of the Serenity Prayer. I can’t change others, I can only change myself. I’ve accepted that, in general (there are exceptions), getting a group of recovering alcoholics (and addicts) to follow through on a commitment is like herding cats. Different people in different places of recovery aren’t going have the same level of follow through of commitments. We have a hard enough time committing to our own sobriety and sane-ness of life!
In your specific case, it may be prudent to spread the responsibilities to others. In stead of the folks calling you when they can’t follow through on their commitment, maybe they should contact other folks themselves to fill in. Get you out of the loop for finding people to fill in.
I would also suggest creating a “call tree”, that lays out for people who they can call within the group to find their own replacement. Again, getting you out of the loop.
You sound very frustrated and resentful. Remember, nothing kills the alcoholic more than resentment. Take this situation to learn why you are so resentful. Do a 4th step to learn what your part is in this situation. Maybe then you will be able to change the only person you can truly change – you. The commitments may not get fulfilled, but you won’t personally be resentful about it. Remember, we can only be responsible for ourselves; not others.
Good luck and ‘keep coming back’! Tom G.